Ten Horror Bests from 2006

And yeah, I didn’t even put any J-horror up in that 10-list, I know. Not out of hostility — though it does seem that, without SCREAM & Co. to prime the audience, get them ‘sick’ again of the slasher but still hungry for horror, THE RING might not have made the kind of splash it did — but just because the J-horror hasn’t seemed that vital lately. At least when made American. Take PULSE. It had its moments, but finally just wasn’t scary, I think. And I also didn’t put any ‘haunting’-type stuff up there. Not because I don’t have a taste for it — it has the potential to be the most scary, really, to get you that debilitating kind of afraid — it’s just I can’t think of any standout ‘hauntings’ for a while now. The closest, I guess, would be THE GRUDGE, or THE OTHERS, or THE EXORCISM OF EMILY ROSE. But those are forever ago already. Not sure why there’s less of them these days either. It have to do with effects, maybe? Like, CGI & etc is so easy now — I suspect that to the filmmakers it feels less like a crutch, more just like keeping up (nevermind that the hyenas look like cartoons) — it’s like the atmosphere never gets properly ‘creeped’ up.

All of which is starting to sound like I’m down on contemporary horror. That’s not what I mean to suggest. There’s some good, exciting stuff being made, and a lot of it’s better than the stuff twenty or thirty years ago. As for my pining for slashers, too, I suspect the reason we see less of them now is that the audience is just so cued into the conventions that it’s hard to sneak any good scares past. Not impossible, though. Just more worth it when it happens.

And, as for a remake-discussion, I’ve yet to understand that whole movement. I mean, BLACK CHRISTMAS, say, or even HALLOWEEN: they both were beautiful and complete in the first place, right? But then this second HILLS HAVE EYES was stronger than the original, I think. And WHEN A STRANGER calls, it was such a different movie that comparing it to the original’s not even all that fair, I don’t think. But then there’s remakes like OMEN, which, though competent-enough, don’t really do anything, don’t add anything. And I’m not even sure when this whole horror-remake thing started. With Gus Van Sant’s PSYCHO? Whatever the reason, there’s of course huge prejudice against the remake. Somewhat justified prejudice too, as the remakes, even if they’re good, make horror vulnerable to that old criticism that we’re just rehashing, that there’s nothing new anymore, that there’s no good, scary ideas left. And if the justification for the remake is that we have better effects or bigger budgets now, so can do it ‘right,’ then that’s just as bad, as it makes horror dependant upon those effects, rather than upon strong writing and competent directing.

I don’t know. It is strange that these ‘do-overs,’ if you will, though they’re rallied against in all the review forums, they’re not met with similar hostility on the comic book shelf. Say, Marvel’s whole Ultimate thing, where they go back in and corral all the Spider-man early years stuff, or the Avengers, the X-Men, whoever. Make the art consistent and the story lines not branching off every which direction. And, I mean, I know I’m a traitor, but I far prefer those Ultimate versions to the originals. And maybe I’m not alone? People don’t seem to badtalk them nearly as much anyway. And I guess it might have something to do with percieved intent: with Spiderman, the idea might be that, with all the different writers and titles, he’s been spread too thin. So, giving him the ‘do-over’ treatment, it’s not rehashing, it’s consolidating, it’s salvaging. Whereas the idea with Hollywood, I think, is that these remakes are seen as a ‘bargain’ for the studios: the movies are already ‘brand-names,’ have built-in audiences, have proven their market viability. So the perceived intent there is that it’s all about the money. Which, I mean, look at Mekhi Phifer in the DAWN OF THE DEAD remake talkshow circuit, asking, in answer to a question about whether he’d studied the original, ‘for no money, you mean?’ Granted, he’s an actor, not the (re)director or (re)writer, but still, we have this idea that remakes are supposed to be labors of love for all involved, yes?

Anyway, no, my big hope with all these remakes, from PSYCHO to THE STEPFORD WIVES to BLACK CHRISTMAS, is that maybe, with HALLOWEEN, we can have a resurgence of slasher-interest. Not just tolerance, but if that movie can prime the audience’s hunger for the slasher like SCREAM did, then we might be getting somewhere. Unless of course it’s to a ‘Ten Year Anniversary’ SCREAM remake . . .